Monday, November 22, 2010

Jennifer Lopez's dress is almost all there

Jennifer Lopez’s appearance at the Carousel of Hope ball (Haha. What? – Ed.) last night was a reminder that FHM’s former Sexiest Woman in the World - and the first woman to have won the award back-to-back – can still shake it with the best of them. Since dropping out of the top ten in 2005, Lopez, now 41, has had twins, set up a Twitter account and, most recently, made a movie called The Back-up Plan that is so bewilderingly shit that even FHM’s girlfriend said, “Please, please turn this crap off”. Don't, whatever you do, go anywhere near it. Not even out of curiosity. It will BITE you. But hey, what a body:Performing on stage with Wayne Rooney, Lopez wore what is known as a Zuhair Murad dress, a sparkly silver number that made her look 1) amazing and 2) like a glam-rock jellyfish. If Jake Shears from the Scissor Sisters was watching at home in his assless chaps, he was watching at home in his assless chaps and boiling with jealousy. Oh boy, just look at her…How does she stay in such good shape? Something called Krav Maga, which is a Jewish sreet-fighting technique that’s so good it’s used by both the FBI and Mossad. So, even if you do ignore our advice and do watch The Back-up Plan, don’t tell Lopez what you really think of it to her face. She will hurt you. And then Wayne Rooney will eat you. And that will suck.

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